Rox Outside the Box: HINDU RITES OF PASSAGE

A Day to Remember

On March 10th our family gathered in Mumbai to celebrate two Hindu samskaras, ceremonies that mark the end of one life stage and the beginning of the next, for my grandsons Karan and Dhruv. For Karan, who is 8, it marked the official end of childhood and entrance into the student stage of life. For Dhruv Kinley, age 3, it was the first haircut ceremony, marking the passage out of babyhood.

Kapil and Tara planned the event themselves, which was held in the activity room of their highrise apartment complex in Bandra, Mumbai. Jayant, Kapil’s father, helped line up the caterers and decorators whom he oversaw with due diligence. It was a beautiful day and they all got up at the crack of dawn to make the preparations for the ceremony which began at noon.

On hand for the ceremony were Tara’s parents Sushil and Keshri, Jayant, and my sister-in-law Manju Bhuaji. Also invited were about 100 guests, friends and U.S. consulate associates as well as complex neighbors. The ceremony was conducted by an Arya Samaji Pandit who did a great job and seemed to enjoy himself.

Here are the boys anxiously waiting for the ceremony to start:

First, it was Karan's turn.

This thread represents Karan’s ties to his family and society, his responsibility for his spiritual development. Teachings are imparted that he must listen to those who are older and wiser than he is, who can guide him in the right path in life.

He must also recite the Gayatri Mantra every day while facing the sun (he already knows the mantra by heart and recites it before meals).

A hovan or fire sacrifice is performed to seal the relationship. All important ceremonies in Hinduism are consecrated by a fire ceremony which invokes all the powers of nature—the 12 directional deities, and the five elements earth, water, fire, air and space, to be witness to the passage. Mantras are recited and upon chanting SVAHA, the fire is fed, and “devours” the offerings, made up of grasses,resins, and various seeds from the earth. The smoke rises and the clouds are “seeded,” bringing rain and fertility to the land.

Similarly our consciousness “devours” the ritual through our five senses: the sound of the mantras, the sight of the fire, the smell of the smoke, and the feel of the heat. Hence, our creative minds are, like the clouds, fertilized by these rituals. Taking part, we are somehow renewed, participating in the rite of passage of these two boys, who are not only a divine gift to us from the Gods, but also represent our gift to the future.

Karan collecting “alms.” The idea is that instead of going to Banaras (the holy city on the Ganges where men go to renounce the world), we will “pay” him to remain a student and enter into the householder stage. NOT to become a holy man before his time. In this way the beat goes on, generation to generation. Many thanks to the generosity of the guests who with their gifts happily persuaded him to stay with his family until he is grown up!

Then Dhruv, who was already getting bored throwing handfuls of samagri into the fire, wasn’t quite sure if he wanted to get his hair cut off after all. (His parents had prepped him for it psychologically for days beforehand):

(It takes a whole family to shave a head)

It was an emotional time for Tara and the two grandmothers. Who likes to see their baby grow up? Must admit, he looks just as cute without his long hair!